A Week and Half in Hampton

People have been asking me how things are going and how I like it here, so I thought it was time for a quick family and friends update.

So far everything is good. It's still only been a week and a half here, and most of that first week was unpacking boxes, but I feel like we've done a lot toward starting to make this place "home".

In the apartment, most everything is put away. We still need a bookcase for the living room so we have a place for the Oxford English Dictionary, and I need to figure out some sort of accessible but neat storage for the play room. I'd also like to get a fold-out thing that will fit in the playroom so we can have somewhere for guests to sleep when the visit. I'd love for people from home to be able to visit often. We have most of our pictures hung. All the curtains are hung, including the Ikea curtains I had planned to hang in the old house six years ago, but never got around to altering to fit. Plus, this week the kids and I started back into the routine of school.

I kept the same color-scheme of red, blue, green, yellow, white, pink, and obnoxiously bright.

The kids and I have had a chance to do a good number of outside activities this week while we work on meeting people and making new friends. On Tuesday there was a bowling night for our apartment community. I believe it was mostly staff members in attendance, but it was a nice group. The kids fit in right away with the other kids that were there, and they all cooperated with bowling together. The older ones helped the little ones and the little ones cheered for the big ones. It was really cute. I had a nice time, too, but didn't really talk much. I guess I'm just more shy than the kids are.

We joined a homeschool group that meets weekly to play at different parks in the area, and this week we also went on our first park trip. It was a bit chilly so there weren't too many families there, but the two that were there were very nice. It seems like this will be a good state for homeschooling, from my conversations with the moms.
The Big One struggled a little at the park. Though the kids were around his age, very friendly, and were playing things he liked (boy things with zombies and sticks and bases and stuff), I think he was a bit overwhelmed and I'm sure is missing our old home as well. The Little One was her usual self.

The park was called Sandy Bottom. It is in the woods and has a large lake with paddle boats and canoes for the summer, camping areas, and walking trails. I thought it was interesting that next to the playground there was a swamp.

After our time at the park there was an Easter Egg hunt at our apartment community. I assured the kids that it wouldn't start right on time at 3:30 and that we'd be fine arriving a little late, but when we pulled up at 3:38 all the kids were sitting around in the grass counting their eggs already. The staff here is super nice and re-scattered some eggs, and our two kids got to have their own private egg hunt. Prizes were awarded by age brackets based on who had collected the most eggs. The staff had saved one prize for people arriving late, and since we were the ones who were late, we won the prize. So, it really worked out in their favor that we weren't right on time.
After the hunt the kids and parents gathered in the club house for coloring and playing, and the Easter Bunny made an appearance for the littler guys.

Matt is enjoying his new job. Today they had a welcome cook-out for him and the other new guy, and the kids and I were allowed to come. Everyone was incredibly nice and welcoming. They fed us really well, and then let us go up in the tower. The Little One called out with delight "It's flying!!" when a plane took off.

I did make the mistake this week of showing the kids how to do temporary tattoos by themselves, then walking away to take a shower. The Big One has been meeting all these people this week with a lightning bolt tattoo on his forehead.

This weekend we are driving back home to visit family for Easter, which will be nice. It is kind of tiring to be around people you don't really know all day. Being home alone with two kids in an apartment isn't much better. I've been missing family and friends at home, as well as our old house and yard.

I am also looking forward to the weekend after, however, when we will finally get some time with all four of us just hanging out and exploring the area. Last weekend Matt drove home and back to get the cats, so we still haven't had a good day with him here and nothing pressing to do since he's returned from his eight week out-of-state trip.

Things I like about here so far:
-Close to everything. Everything is less than 30 minutes away, and most things are only 5 minutes. There is all the shopping and food you could ever need or want.
-Everyone's really nice. Everyone.

Things that aren't too great:
-Major roads are everywhere, so everywhere is near a major road. I guess I'll get used to the road noise, but right now it seems so loud. There has been a major multi-lane rod or highway easily visible at all three parks we've visited. It's just different than being out in the country.

Preparing for a New Baby Checklist

For the last six plus years, prior to just recently, I've worked as a nurse in maternal-child health. I did some time in labor and delivery, newborn nursery, postpartum (mother-baby), and antepartum (inpatient high risk pregnancy care). It's kind of like, my "thing". I also have had two of my own children, and chose to deliver them at home with the help of the midwive and a doula. So, though all my professional experience has been in a hospital, I know about a many of the other options that are available (or not so available, unfortunately), to mothers and families.

Outside of official work time, I've had the pleasure of serving as a support person for many family members and friends as they've become parents, sometimes just answering questions over the phone, sometimes being right there as a doula for their labor and delivery. For awhile I explored becoming a certified postpartum doula, and completed all the steps just short of turning my packet in on time. I still have it sitting on a shelf, postmarked and everything. Oh well.

It was during my time working on my postpartum doula certification and helping some family members, friends, and even a few strangers, that I wrote up this preparation checklist. I'm currently in a baby lull as I wait for friends to get married and pregnant, so I thought maybe I'd share this on here in case it might be helpful for someone else. It's long, so click on the link just under this picture to read on.

Yogi Tea's Blueberry Slim Life

I'm not a coffee drinker. I like the smell. I like coffee ice cream. I like coffee in chocolate cake. But I just can't drink it, even with lots of cream and sugar and fancy coffee things in it.

Before recently, I wouldn't say I was much for tea, either. It's okay, and nice to have something warm to drink, but it hasn't been anything much to me. Turns out, I was drinking the wrong tea. I took a chance on buying some of the slightly more expensive tea in the store, and I could really taste the difference in quality. It wasn't bland. It didn't need a whole bunch of doctoring up with lemon, sweeteners, or cream. It was good!

For the last few weeks I've been drinking a tea made by Yogi Tea called Blueberry Slim Life. It advertises itself with "Energizes and supports a dieting program". I first picked it for these claims, as at the time I was really focusing on diet and exercise, and who doesn't need some energizing?

This tea tastes good! I look forward to having a cup in the morning. I wouldn't say I crave it, as some coffee drinkers seem to crave their coffee, but I do look forward to it. I'm sad in the morning when I've run out and haven't been to the store yet, but I'm not "addicted". This is a good thing. It has just enough caffeine (35mg per 8oz cup) to be a mini pick-me-up. 

Ultimately, I'm not really sure how much it has effected my diet. I've eating well and exercising, so though I have lost weight, it probably had more to do with those things than the tea. I can say that the tea didn't make me any hungrier, though, if that's something other teas can do. If you're one who enjoys a super sugar-and-creamed coffee in the morning, and need something lighter to drink in the morning, this certainly would support your dieting program. Green tea has been noted to have many possible health benefits, including maintaining a healthy weight and antioxidant powers, and blueberries as well. So drinking this certainly can't hurt.

Another thing that probably helps this tea's diet claims is that it is naturally sweeter than most. I can really taste the blueberries, but not in an artificial or overpowering way. Just enough that I don't feel the need to add a bunch of honey or sugar. I have tried adding Truvia, Necresse, and Splenda (not at the same time, of course), and they all did make the tea sweeter, but it's really not needed.

One extra little piece that Yogi tea brand includes is a special little message on their labels. I enjoy them a lot. Sometimes I'll get the same one a few days in a row, which can be kind of disappointing, but many days I get a smile out of it. Last night I got this message, which was a nice reminder:

(Disclaimer - I don't get any kind of compensation for this. I don't know anyone who works for Yogi Tea. I just like the tea, and think you might like it, too.)

"Why do you homeschool?"

My two kids, seven years old and four years old, are homeschooled. They always have been, and unless they request otherwise, they probably always will be. When people hear that I homeschool them, the first question I always get is "why?" Sometimes it's more of an upset, "why!?!" It seems like half the people I talk to have thought about doing the same with their kids and just need someone to back them up, and the other half think I'm either crazy or ridiculous or damaging my children or maybe all three.

The question does kind of bother me sometimes. I try not to get defensive, but I don't ask why people decide to send their children away for seven hours a day to a government building filled with more kids than adults, so it's a little upsetting that my choices would be automatically questioned. For those who ask the question in a more upset or condescending tone of "why!?!", I usually respond with something short like "why not?" It saves me from getting more defensive and potentially offensive, as can happen sometimes with the looks and comments many "well meaning" people give.

However, like I said, there are a number of others who are genuinely curious about homeschooling, and for them here is the longer version of the response to "why?"

The list of reasons parents decide to homeschool their children is as varied as the families that do it. Many of the families I've met have had their kids in public or private school at some point and decided to pull them out, either because the particular school or teacher wasn't a good fit for their child, or because their child wasn't a good fit for the classroom environment in general. Some have children with special needs, be they physical, psychological, medical, 'gifted and talented' (for lack of a better word), or otherwise, and the school system wasn't meeting or couldn't meet their needs. There are families that homeschool just one or two of their kids, sometimes because of special needs, and the rest attend public or private school.

Other families travel a lot, for example with the military, and completing school at home provides more stability for their children than would starting in different schools with different programs repeatedly.

There are also a good number of religious homeschoolers, whose duties within their religion include the education of their children. Some parents are more "anti-establishment" (again, for lack of a better word) and just don't want their children in a government system such as the school system. For others, school safety is a big concern and they'd rather have their children at home.

In areas and even whole states, from what I hear, where the public school system is "not the best" and private school may be too expensive, homeschooling can be the option families choose. I've heard of parents who felt they were doing so much work with their child at home after school - in homework, tutoring, or just extra things to boost their knowledge base - that it made more sense to just do all of school from home in the first place. 

The list goes on and on, and I certainly can't know, nor do I want or need to know, all the reasons people choose to teach their children from home.

For me, quite simply, homeschooling just makes logical sense.

To answer the question, "When did you start homeschooling?", which is another I get a lot, is difficult. Basically, we've been homeschooling since birth. All parents teach their children about the world when they are infants. Then, the kids get a little older and the vast majority of parents, probably with varying degrees of success, teach their children to count, sing the ABCs, know their colors and shapes, and all of that. Maybe if our kids are catching on we start to do some reading or easy math. We let them help in the kitchen, teach basic manners, show them how to pick up toys, maybe we let them use the computer with help - this is all learning. This is where homeschooling started for me with my kids.

Learning doesn't happen in a vacuum. People don't reach the magical age of six and suddenly they must go to a specific building at a specific time to meet with a specially trained person in order to acquire knowledge. When it came time to register with the state, I didn't feel it was necessary to stray from what we were already doing at home, and so we registered as homeschoolers. The Big One was smart, learning well, comfortable in his surroundings, had plenty of playmates (posts on the issue of 'socialization' coming soon), and my husband and I were lucky enough to be in a place where either one or the other of us could be home to continue the teaching.

Additionally, we've felt it to be our duty as parents, not so much in a religious way as a personal way, to teach our children what we feel is important for them to know. It just seems like something too great and important to leave in the hands of someone else.

This is not to say that we started without any trepidation. I attended public school, my husband attended private, and neither of us knew what homeschooling should or would really be. It didn't take long for us to find our way, however, and I believe things have been moving along pretty well. Not that I am an expert by any means, but I am comfortable. (Posts on the "hows of homeschooling" coming soon.)

As we've continued on this path, I've come to love so many different things about homeschooling. I now also consider these things that I love part of my 'why we do it'.

I love having my children home with me. That is not saying they do not drive me crazy - they do - but I believe it is my responsibility as a parent to deal with that craziness. I love that we can have a relaxed breakfast in the morning, we can go to the park on a nice afternoon if we want to, and I know what they are up to throughout the day. I love being able to be the one who sees them as they learn something new or when something difficult finally "clicks". I don't miss out on birthday lunches or the loosing of teeth. They are only young for so long, and yes, the time is precious.

The flexibility of homeschooling is great. I don't have to be home to meet the kids at the bus stop at any particular time, we can take our "break" days or weeks whenever we want, we can skip school on a Monday and make up on a Saturday if we feel like it. We can also do our "school time" at the time of day when we all are most ready to learn, which may not be, and in fact is not, 9am. When we moved last week, we took two weeks of Spring Break, then yesterday just picked up where we left off. No need to worry about changing classrooms or teachers.

It's awesome to see how much the Little One learns just by being around the Big One at "school time". I'll never forget when she was three years old, and correctly called out the answer to a question, "the Tigris and Euphrates!"

As someone who dealt with Irritable Bowel Syndrome through much of the later years of school, I like that my children can go to the bathroom when they need to - in their own bathroom, without having to ask for a pass, for face embarrassment for getting up to go for the fifth time. Sometimes, it's the little things.

My kids can eat many smaller meals through the day, as all the nutrition guides say to, instead of limiting them to just breakfast, lunch, and dinner. They can eat when they are hungry, and not when the clock says "Lunch time".

I don't have to worry about school violence or bullying, except for when they fight with each other, and I don't have to wonder what kind of adults they are with (isn't that sad that that even has to be a concern?).

I love that we can cater what we are studying or the way we are studying it to the way our children learn, to what we think is important for them to learn, and to what they want to learn, at least to some extent. The Big One is a smart kid, but he's also very social and loves to make people laugh. All the time. He does well with one-on-one learning, but would be a disaster in a classroom full of other kids. The local teachers should be glad we keep him home. The Little One, on the other hand, seems like more of an independent learner so far, and has to have everything on her terms, so we try to work with that. It may just be an age thing, but the great part of homeschooling is that, without having an entire room full of kids to worry about, I have the flexibility to adapt things to their changing ages and stages.

One of the things I love the most about homeschooling is that in addition to "book learning" my kids are learning about being in a home and community. They help with the chores, they help at the grocery store, they check out their own books at the library. They are learning about taking care of pets, being a good neighbor, making their meals, household time management, and so many other practical things that they might miss if they were gone for most of the day. And honestly, as an adult, which things do you use most in your day-to-day life?

Finally, I am enjoying our studies myself. I don't know if I even learned medieval history in school. If I did I don't remember. But I'm learning it now. I've never been good at math, but relearning the basics in a new way is actually helping me. I finally get what an adverb is! So, I'm not always so much "teaching" as I am learning right along with them.

Why do I homeschool?
Well, why not? It just makes sense for us.

Chocolate Chip Cookie Pancakes

I like making things from scratch. I may not have the most amazing top-quality ingredients in my house, or be a classically trained chef, but making things from their simplest parts (or those available at the grocery anyway - I'm not even close to self-sufficient) just tastes better than pre-mixed boxed things.

Here, for example, we have pancakes. The boxed powder stuff has its purpose, sure. It's quick and easy and hey, it's not bad tasting. But it's not real pancakes. This weekend I made the kids these Chocolate Chip Cookie Pancakes, which is just a basic pancake recipe very slightly doctored up, and they were delighted. They told me it was "much better than the old recipe", which was not so much a recipe as it was a panel on the side of a box. It's true, they are better. And guess what? They don't take that much longer, either. You might get a few extra measuring spoons dirty, but it's totally worth it.

Chocolate Chip Cookie Pancakes

Ingredients
1c buttermilk (or 3/4c milk + 2 T vinegar or lemon juice)
1c flour
2T sugar
1t baking powder
1/2t baking soda
1/2t salt
1 egg
2T melted butter (or vegetable oil)
1t vanilla extract
chocolate chips
cooking spray

Steps
1. Measure buttermilk and set aside. Or, if using regular milk, mix with vinegar or lemon juice and set aside to sour.
2. In a large bowl or measuring device with spout, whisk together flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Set aside.
3. In a separate bowl or measuring device with spout, whisk together buttermilk or soured milk, egg, melted butter or oil, and vanilla extract.
4. Add liquid ingredients to dry ingredients and whisk until all lumps are gone.
5. Heat a griddle or frying pan on medium heat. Spray with cooking spray. Pour pancake batter onto pre-heated griddle to desired pancake size. Sprinkle desired amount of chocolate chips onto upright side of pancake. Cook until edges begin to dry slightly and small bubbles form in middle of top. Flip with spatula. Cook pancake until underside is brown.
6. Remove from pan. Serve!

Yield - about 8 medium-sized pancakes
(Adapted from "Fluffy Pancakes" by Kris on allrecipes.com)


I made 8 pancakes with this recipe, using 2% milk soured with lemon juice, vegetable oil, and a total of 16 grams of mini chocolate chips. Putting this into the LoseIt! app on my phone gave me a count of 136 calories per pancake.

Right after I made them, I thought I should have experimented with subbing brown sugar for some of the white sugar. I bet that would have given an even more 'cookie' taste. I will play with that next time, and update with how that went.

Now, the steps in pictures. I know my pictures are not great, but I can't get better if I don't practice, right?

The making of Chocolate Chip Cookie Pancakes

If you are prepared enough to have buttermilk on hand- good for you. I was not, and didn't have vinegar, either, so I used milk soured with lemon juice.

Dry ingredients assembled and my helper whisking them up. That's the souring milk sitting to the side, there.

Liquid ingredients assembled, my helper whisking them up, and the final batter. I had pulled out butter to use, but ultimately measured out vegetable oil instead, simply because I was too lazy to melt the butter.

Preheat the pan and spray it with cooking spray. We like to call the first batch the 'tester batch', as they usually end up ugly while we wait for the pan to heat.
Have your chocolate chips at the ready while you're preparing your pan. I used mini semi-sweet chocolate chips because I had them handy, but regular sized or whatever you like will do.
See how nicely light browned the first side is after flipping? I find that looking at the bubbles can be a little deceiving - these seem to bubble a lot! - but waiting for that slight drying around the edge is more helpful.

Pancakes!
I like to eat them plain, as the chocolate is plenty of sweet, but you could add syrup, fruit, whipped cream, powdered sugar, or whatever you typically enjoy on pancakes.

The Big One is asking me if he can have them again this morning.

Update:
I tried them wit half brown sugar and half white and didn't really notice a difference. So, use whatever you'd like.

We're here!

Things moved kind of fast, and then I was without a proper computer internet connection for a bit, so my appologies for not updating sooner.
We made it to Hampton!

Last Tuesday, just a day after my last post, my dad and I decided at 5pm to get a uhaul truck and move on Wednesday morning. I had some great family and friends ready to come help as soon as I called, and we had the storage shed where the majority of our belongings had been stashed packed into the truck within a hour or two. I was glad to have my dad manage the loading, as I had no idea how was best to fit everything into the truck and tie it down. Early Wednesday morning we recruited my brother-in-law and his girlfriend, and took the drive down to the apartment. Everything was unloaded within an hour, we reassembled the furniture that needed it, and were back home by bedtime.

Thursday I had an all-day trip to Ikea, after the first store I went two didn't have the bed I wanted for the little one, so I had to drive an hour to another Ikea, and got stuck in rush-hour traffic on the way home. I love Ikea, I really do, but just like Target I can't get out of there without spending all of my money.

Last Saturday, I got to pick up my husband at the airport after eight whole weeks away. Luckily, his flight arrived a little ahead of schedule so I didn't have to wait in the "cell phone lot" very long. What a sad place - a bunch of people sitting in their cars, anxiously looking around and peering at their phones, waiting for their arrivals to call. With each car engine that started everyone would jump, like "maybe mine will be next!" Anyway, it's very nice to have him back again.

After a very brief visit with family we packed up the cars with what we could fit (in the last minute rush on Tuesday night I didn't get to / forgot to pack up some of the things that could have actually gone then) and went down to the apartment for good this time. I wish I had kept count on the odometer how many miles I drove in that week. My butt was tired of sitting.

The rest of the week has been primarily composed of unpacking boxes, washing everything, and putting things away. The living room is mostly done, except it is large enough that we can 'float' the couch away from the wall and make a little arts and crafts area behind it. The dining area is done except pictures on the wall. The bedrooms, kitchen, and bathrooms are done. The kids decided to share a bedroom (with just beds and book shelves in it) so the third room could be a playroom. That is the last remaining room to finish. I just don't know how to tackle the piles of toys and games, so for now they are just that - piles.

 Kid's bathroom - They picked the shower curtain themselves! I promise the colors match more in real life.

 Kid's bedroom - The Big One has Super Mario themed things, the Little One has My Little Pony and Tangled

I've taken the kids out for a few adventures. The first nice day we had I told them we could go to the park, which to them means a playground of course. So, I looked up a park on my phone. It was called "Carosel Park", how could I go wrong? Well, it was just that, a Carosel, which was closed for the season. They cried and I scurried to look up another park nearby. This one was called "River Walk Park", and again the name was quite literal. It was a walkway by the river. Again they cried, and again I scurried to look something else up. Finally, we ended up less than 2 miles from our apartment at "Bluebird Gap Farm". I finally did it!

Bluebird Gap Farm is somewhat like a petting zoo, except the animals stay in their enclosures, so unless they come to the fence, which I'm sure they will if you buy the feed, you can't really pet them. They have a variety of fowl including a gorgeous male peacock, horses, pigs, cows, llamas, goats, a deer, and other animals. We didn't go to the rabbit house. They also have a lovely garden and, to the kid's delight, a playground! Best of all for me, it's free admission. Though at that point I would have been willing to pay to avoid continued tears.

Yesterday we tried again to find somewhere to go. This time we only had to make one stop - I made sure I researched the playground aspect beforehand. We went to Huntington Park, which is right on the James River. It has tennis courts, a fishing area, a War Museum, a boat launch (is that what you call it?), a beach, and Fort Fun. Fort Fun is a large playground area on a little bluff right along the water. It's really neat how they laid it out, and was very clean and well maintained. There is section that had fake trees and rocks and a 'fort' area to play in, two big playground ships, and an area for younger kids that was similarly themed. Plus things like swings, and something I haven't seen at a public park in awhile - a tire swing.

The kids enjoyed playing there for a good hour, despite the cold wind that was hurting my ears. The Little One wanted to go walk on the sand of the beach. On the way out of the parking lot I decided "I know where I'm going", and did not turn on the GPS. I turned the wrong direction right away and ended up going over the James River Bridge. The kids were not happy about that. They have no sense of adventure.

Keeping things together

I found a blog post on Tiny Buddha that really struck a chord with me tonight. It's been a trying day. The time has just dragged on. I'm ready for this week to be over already! I'm a perpetual planner, and right now I feel like I've run out of things to plan, which is causing anxiety. Anything I had planned in the last couple weeks seems to have crumbled apart, and at this point everything is out of my hands. I feel kind of lost, out of control, and I guess purposeless. I have no job anymore. I'm having to rely on other people to help me watch the kids and get us moved to the new place. This week I was supposed to be setting up house, but instead I'm just kind of sitting and waiting. Sitting and waiting is not what I do best.

So, I thought it perfect that I came across "4 Ways to Remain Centered Amid All of the Chaos", where the author talks about how backward we are in looking for peace on the outside to create peace in the inside. She writes, "If something comes up that doesn’t go according to my plan, I spend sleepless nights trying to figure out 'what to do.' [...] I will scour the Internet for any hints and solutions I can find." Hmm, that sounds familiar.

She goes on to give four tips for how to re-center ourselves and stay positive and calm. I especially like the last tip, which is to stay focused on life purpose. Though, while in times of depression or anxiety it can be easy to write this tip off - "I don't even know what my purpose is. Clearly I don't have a purpose." - as the author writes, "We are here on this Earth for one purpose alone: to be and spread unconditional love."

Ohh, love. That makes sense. I can handle that. That is a much nicer thing to focus on. I don't have to just sit and wait. I can sit and wait and send out loving-kindness to the world. Over that, I do have control.

On finding an apartment in 24 hours

Okay, maybe it was a little bit more than 24 hours. 28? Anyway, I found us a new apartment quick.

My husband had a meeting with his job on Friday and they told him that he would not, in fact, be going where we had originally been told. It's a good thing we had kind of predicted this (see previous post) and I had postponed going down to the original place Friday morning to sign a lease with our previously researched apartment. The new job assignment is at a better facility, and in a town we're more excited to be in, but instead of moving 86 miles away, we're moving 216 miles away. This change also means that instead of having about three months to find a place to live, which we had done already for the original destination, we have just over a week. Or I should say, had just over a week, because I already found the place! Go me!

I got the text message from my husband late Friday morning telling me that he'd met with HR and where he would be reassigned. I immediately got online and started checking things out, as I wasn't even sure exactly where it was. Then I did a little dance and showed the kids the map - it's near the beach! I posted to facebook to see if any friends were familiar with the area, and luckily got some quick feedback about which parts were better than others. I opened up rent.com and apartmentratings.com and started my new apartment search. One thing I had going for me is that I already knew what we wanted in a place and what price range we were working with. I think this may be where it gets messy for some people, if they are unsure what they're looking for or what they can afford (and not afford!). I knew we preferred 3 bedroom, the place needed to allow cats, and it had to have both a playground and a pool for the kids. This, combined with price and the fact that we needed immediate availability, really limited our choices. However, when you're trying to get something done quick without a lot of wishy-washiness, limited choices can be a good thing. I also limited the listings on Apartment Ratings to those with greater than 50% recommendation rate, but really wanted to stay with greater than 75%.

Based on the cost on rent.com and rating on Apartment Ratings, and not just the score but what they wrote, as some people have bogus reviews, I searched each apartment's website and read about it, and searched it on a map to see how far it was from my husband's job.

Once I had a list of a few places that had what we were looking for in our price range, some available immediately and some in the next 30 days, I made a quick table on Word listing them all out. Each place got a row, with columns noting the name, the address, the number of beds and baths, the price, the distance from work, and general notes.

Since family had planned to be helping us move this weekend, and then had random free time when we decided we weren't, they were able to watch the kids for me while my mom and I made a quick road trip down to check out the area. Despite not getting to bed until 2am the night before, I was up at 7:30am Saturday morning, double checking that I had everything I wanted to see on my list, and we were on the road by 9:30am. We got to the area around 1:30pm and started checking places out right away. The first apartment community was okay, and had immediate availability, but the neighborhood in front of it was comprised these random rows of blue shacks with forlorn looking people sitting around outside. We asked the leasing agent what the deal was with those and she started off with, "You know, I'm not really sure!" That pretty much eliminated that apartment as an option.

During my initial research on Friday I had made appointments with two other communities, which turned out to be a good thing since there were a lot of people out apartment hunting Saturday! We might not have gotten to see anything at all if we had come as walk-ins. But, by 4pm we had seen two more places with immediate availability, and driven past / around a couple with availability in the next 30 days. Ultimately, I went with a community with immediate 3-bedroom apartment availability, where I thought it would be best for the kids. I liked the layout of the interior of a different apartment better, but this was the only gated community and they offered a lot of community activities, in addition to the things I required of any place (pool, playground, etc). Rather than mess around and ponder on it, we went right back and completed an application and signed a lease. By 6pm, we had an apartment address. Again. And this time at the place we are really going.
Mom and I finally allowed a break to get something to eat around 7pm, and got back home at 10:30pm. What a day!

I'm sure there are people who do quick moves routinely, but this our first time living in an apartment, as well as first time moving any significant distance, and it is a pain. I think I did a few things right in that I:
-went knowing what I wanted and what didn't really matter (countertops in the hottest color? I don't care)
-made appointments with communities I really wanted to see
-had all paperwork and numbers in a folder and ready in case we needed them (social security, drivers license, car tag numbers, etc)
-was honest about our situation up front. Situation meaning how we had just found out about the job transfer, that we were coming from out of state and couldn't drive back and forth multiple times, and that my husband is even further out of state.
-had a more-or-less neutral third party with me to give her opinion of places and write notes as I was talking to the leasing agents. Plus, she talked to me to keep me awake on the way there and back. Thank you, Mom!

I also think I ended up making the right decision in selecting something with a higher recommendation rating that was more family and kid friendly, than taking a gamble on a cheaper place with mixed ratings or a questionable neighborhood. There are three hospitals very close by I'm told, so I may just have to check those out for some part-time hours.

Next thing, I have to figure out how I'm going to get us and all our stuff down there!

We are not moving tomorrow

As many family and friends know, we've been waiting to move out-of-state for awhile. I started preparing mentally when my husband was in the final semester of school. We also started preparing our house by finishing up projects and beginning to pare down on our belongings. We gave away a lot and sold some on Amazon.

About a year ago my husband was able to apply for a job (that crazy process will probably require its own post), and after a nervous wait we finally found out which state we'd be moving to. As I mentioned in my last post, we then moved in with my parents, sold/gave away our little home business of making and selling soap, staged our house, and sold it. All that time, while we knew what state the job would be in, we didn't get to know where exactly it would be or when it would start. We held out for another long, anxious wait to get that news. Every day I expected a phone call or something in the mail. Finally, a couple weeks before Christmas, we got to find out. My husband would leave for an eight-week job training one-thousand three hundred seventy one miles away (yes, I checked) in January, and we'd all move to our final destination in March.
My husband called to tell me the news while I was at work. I was so excited, after I hung up the phone I yelled at the nurse's station, "My husband's leaving!!!" 

All has been going well since then, despite the obvious difficulties of being separated for the last 7 weeks. Before my husband left for training we got an apartment lined up in Manassas. In the last week, I resigned from my job, scheduled the lease-signing appointment and a uhaul truck, recruited helpers for moving and child-watching, and overall got the whole Operation Move set-up. This weekend was going to be it!
But, there's this little thing going on right now called sequestration. A lot of people are being affected by it, especially around where we live. If you're as under a rock as I am, it's some government and budget thing. You know, trying to figure out how to cut costs to make the country not so in debt. I probably could look up and read more about it, but I honestly don't care that much. I like a lot of things, but politics and government are not those things. At all.

Anyway, what it means for us is that the Federal Aviation Administration, who employs the air traffic controllers, has a list of smaller air traffic facilities that could be shut down, should they need to do that to save money. Or something like that. On Monday, my husband heard that of the class graduating the training academy (where he is) this week, those who were going to facilities on that potential shut-down list were transferred to new places instead. My husband's facility is on that "could be closed" list.

Now here's the fun part: No one knows if my husband's job will still be at the same place, or if it will be transferred. Not HR, not his soon-to-be manager, not the people at the training facility. Yey government! He graduates next week, so we assume they will get it figured out and, hopefully, inform him sometime within the next week. In the meantime, we decided it prudent to not go sign a lease and move into a place where we may or may not have jobs.

I'm getting used to the waiting and the anxious-unknown at this point. At first I was stressed about this all, especially since I had everything all ready to go. But, now that I've postponed the lease signing, cancelled the uhaul truck, and told friends to make other plans, it's not so bad. It'll be what it'll be. I'm a little worried about what I'm going to do next week, as I had planned to busy myself with unpacking boxes while I count down the days to getting to pick my husband up from the airport, but I'm sure I'll find something. Keep your fingers crossed that maybe we get sent somewhere cooler than originally planned!

Starting from the beginning

Not that long ago I wrote a blog called Bug in the Brain as a way to keep friends and family informed while going through a difficult situation, without having to tell the same story over and over again. Since then, a handful of my readers have encouraged me to keep writing and sharing. I've wanted to, but haven't found any one topic or niche to which I could commit myself to continue an entire blog. Recently I've decided, however, that I don't need a niche. It's my blog, I can write what I want. Besides, my life has been a little bit on the exciting side, so that can be a topic in itself.

As the title suggests, any readers of Something And Other could expect a hodge-podge from me. I'm a nurse, homeschooling mother of two, baker, want-to-be fitness enthusiast, novice painter, crafter, pinterest addict, (mostly) vegetarian, and wife to a training-to-be air traffic controller. All of these things will likely be reflected in this blog, as well as serving as a place to continue to keep friends and family up-to-date on the latest happenings in our lives.

Hopefully, this will also my place to catalog thoughts and readings on my never-ending journey to develop mindfulness and happiness in daily life. It's been a busy decade for me and my family, with major life events happening pretty much every year.

My husband and I met at 17 years old, were married when I was 19, and had our first child when I was 20. At 21, I graduated nursing school, got a job on the night shift, and we bought our first house. At 22, we had our second child. Just under a year later, my husband's father passed away from glioblastoma multiforme. We found I had a brain tumor one week after that. So, shortly after my 24th birthday, I had brain surgery to remove the tumor, resulting in a deaf ear, a constant headache, and paralyzing one side of my face. I required months off work for multiple therapies. By age 25 I was suffering chronic migraines and started to feel overall really bad - chronically exhausted, weak, nauseated, headachey, faint - but still worked while my husband was in school for air traffic control. We both homeschooled the kids, and managed to arrange our schedules so as to never have them in school or daycare. Family helped a lot.

Continuing to feel worse, I went to the doctors, and after rounds of testing was given a probable diagnosis of dysautonomia. More specifically, postural orthostatic tachycardia (POTS). By age 26, while I continued to spiral downward with the 'dysautnomia', my husband finished school and we learned his future job would be in a different state. We didn't know get to know where it would be exactly, or when it would start. In preparation, we moved in with my parents, sold our house, and waited for word on the job. By the end of that year, miserable and depressed with constantly feeling ill, I began to start reading more about mindfulness, Buddhism, and using meditation for chronic pain. I stopped taking all the medications I had been put on for chronic migraine and dysautonomia, and as I 'detoxed' my symptoms began to improve. I believe my so-called condition was medication induced. For my 27th birthday, my husband and I went on a 6+ mile hike, which was an amazing thing. Currently, we are still living with my parents, I've just quit my job, my husband is away for job training. We (almost) know where we are moving, but that's a whole story in itself.

Despite the ups and downs of the past years, coworkers, family, and friends have commented on my spirit through it all. Many times, they were the ones that kept me laughing. I can't say it's always been easy, and many times it's been downright impossible, but I've tried to make light of the difficult times. So, while I don't claim to be an expert in anything, I hope that maybe I can write something here that inspires others to find the joy in something and others.